Do you find that you and your spouse have time to talk? I don't mean just question and answer...do you actually talk?
Remember when you were dating how you stayed on the phone for hours rambling about nothing! What you doin'? Nothin'. What you doin'? Back then, you were trying to impress one another by doing whatever you thought you had to do to keep that person's interest.
Well, for those of us who have kids, that means putting the kids to bed early to allow for some time for you and your spouse to talk. Now, that is the true test.
How do you put the kids to bed early? Priorities! It seems, you've got to make spouse time a priority. Some of you are able to get your kids to bed early but are not using that opportunity to talk to your spouse. And no... asking, "Did you set the alarm does not qualify as meaningful conversation"! I am thinking it can only occur at the end of the evening... at least for my family. Since we are full speed ahead heading for 'night-night' as soon as we walk in the door from work. And with a two year old (going on 52) it is difficult for mommy and daddy to get a word in edge wise.
For those of you who have figured it out, WHAT'S THE SECRET? How do you get in your daily dose of spouse talk? What do you talk about? What happens if you miss a day? I often find myself wanting to talk to my husband about something and then something else comes up and pushes that topic to the back of my mind only to never be spoken of again...until I arrive home one evening and realize that no one picked the baby up! (I knew there was something I was needing to tell him!)
Or better then that, you over hear your husband mention to a friend that he is taking medication to lower his cholesterol. What!$@#@!*! He never told me that...or maybe he did, but I thought he said something about changing his oil!
Signed,
Looking for ways to lower my baby daddy's cholesterol!
Monday, July 9, 2007
Let's Talk About Talking!
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2 comments:
Great Topic!!! I can't speak on the child or children aspect of the relationship, because I am not a parent. But, I can touch with you on the not "TALKING" part. Help me...What do you do when you feel as if he talks to others more than he talks to you? We talk, but, he seems to have more energy when he is conversing with his associates. I don't understand...
In my opinion, men seem to get in a rut....taking wives/girlfriends for granted. Talk to him about how important it is that you talk to each other. Be specific about your concern and diligent in your attempt. I have found that I have greater success if I don't try and talk when he does not want to talk...for example, as soon as he walks in the door is his time to unwind just like talking to me first thing in the morning is useless. Be aware of your mates preferences and find ways to engage in ongoing two-way conversation. I had to express to my husband how important it is to hear his voice during the day...and yep that is exactly how I said it! Which is a lot different from why you don't call me during the day?!@#! I appreciate that he takes time out of his day to call to check on me and see how my day is going and if he doesn't call....he texts me! (Which is different then sex me!)
Signed,
Just a black woman's opinion!
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